Wings of Desire - POV, March 1999

Wings of Desire

Beyond Tabasco, beyond wasabi and jalapeno and habanero--beyond any fire that has ever crossed your lips--lies Mad Dog Inferno Hot Sauce Buffalo Wings.  These wings, available only at Burger Bob’s, an unassuming café in Bozeman, Montana, may very well represent the world’s spiciest meal.  The restaurant actually has a disclaimer that must be read aloud to all wing orderers: persons with heart or respiratory problems, and those under the age of eighteen, are not permitted to taste them.

The Mad Dog wings are only available on Wednesdays when Bob holds a contest to see if anyone can down a dozen of them.  At least half the contestants take one bit and quit.  Few finish more than three.  Two people in Bob’s wings contest’s brief ten-month history have cleaned their plates.  The first brought Pepto-Bismol and a milkshake; the second vomited shortly after ingesting his final wing.  It was what one might call a Pyrrhic victory.

And what did these gustatory Magellans earn for their trouble?  A refund of the $5.95 it cost for the platter, and not a penny more.   --Michael Finkel

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